If I could just give them a pill and skip the whole mess, I would. Until then, I’ve decided to mix things up, adding a food delivery a week just to share the load. Even if the kids don’t fall for the mystery dinner of the week, then at least the hubby and I will be happy to get out of our weeknight classics funk. But while test-driving some of the services out there, we discovered the kids like many of them too—like a lot.

Here are my favourite finds and weeknight go-to food delivery services that really helped this mama out:

Fresh Prep

With delivery to over 130 cities across four provinces (British Columbia, Alberta, Ontario, and Quebec), Fresh Prep was launched over 10 years ago by three lifelong friends who wanted to make home-cooked meals easier for busy people without the waste that often comes with traditional meal kits. They deliver in reusable cooler bags and offer most recipes in their patented Zero Waste Kit. They are continuing to scale zero-waste solutions and partner with Canadian organizations to fight food insecurity, reduce food waste, and donate meals to those in need around the year.

HelloFresh

Hello, AH-MAZING! From the turkey burrito bowl to the gnocchi bolognese, my family loved it all. The biggest excitement for sure comes from trying something different. We even discovered some new flavours the kids enjoyed—like cilantro? Who knew! The way it works is you subscribe, choose your meals for the week and schedule deliveries—you can skip weeks and cancel any time you want to. Unlike regular takeout though, you prepare the meal. HelloFresh sends you everything you need, including perfectly portioned and packaged ingredients and easy-to-follow instructions, making it easy to whip up something delicious, even for someone like me who’s not so great in the kitchen. (Tip: I keep the recipe cards so I can recreate dishes we love.)

One thing though: While most dishes list prep times of 30 minutes or so, personally I found it took me longer to cook when you factor in cutting up the ingredients. You can add on the time (approx. 10-15 minutes), or pay extra to have everything pre-cut for you—a plus especially on busy weeknights. So why bother at all? It’s cheaper and healthier than takeout. And while it may seem more expensive than groceries, portion sizing reduces waste and can bring down the overall cost when you factor ingredients you have to buy in bulk and end up wasting when you don’t use all of it.

Chef’s Plate

Just like HelloFresh, Chef’s Plate is a meal subscription service that delivers all the ingredients you need to make one delicious dish after another. They both share a similar menu aesthetic, a family-friendly fusion food mix. In fact, it’s hard to tell the difference, except that Chef’s Plate might be a little more affordable, by a couple of dollars or so per serving. Know, though, that if you don’t make your picks for the week and you’ve subscribed, they’ll send you a random selection, which didn’t work out for my family. So be sure to get your choices in on time, or pause service if need be, if you’ve got picky eaters at your table. The great thing about both is that we’ve been getting way more veggies into the kids’ bellies—the food tastes so good, they don’t even notice!

GoodFood

This one is a breakfast option, but we’re big fans of breakfast for dinner every now and again! And Goodfood Breakfast is an expansion of the ready-to-cook dinner box option Goodfood already offers. They’re crafted to maximize the nutritional punch of breakfasts, with the ease and simplicity parents all need in the morning (or on a busy weeknight!) The breakfast box is customizable with up to twelve different items; including a mix of both ready-to-blend Smoothies and Artisanal Oat Bowls. Mmm…

TruLocal

I haven’t tried it yet, but I can’t wait to. TruLocal doesn’t deliver meals per se, but you can order the best meat from the best, local sources all at this one-stop-shop. From organic to grass-fed, meat, chicken and fish too, you’ll find all cuts here, as well as some that are already seasoned. Again, it takes the guesswork out of the grocery aisles and where your food comes from, saving time and peace of mind.

Skip the Dishes, Door Dash & Uber Eats

Using food delivery services like Skip the Dishes, Door Dash, and Uber Eats used to be a real splurge but have become the norm for enjoying your favourite take out delivered to your home. To look for savings, compare prices across different the apps and restaurants, look for first-time user bonuses, sign up for loyalty programs, and order during off-peak hours. Avoid hidden fees by meeting minimum order requirements and try to time your order during promotional windows of free or discounted delivery and low-surge hours for the best value.

Related Reading:

Best Subscription Boxes for Moms That Ship to Canada

The post Food Delivery Services in Canada for Busy Moms and Dads appeared first on SavvyMom.

But truly, the struggle began when I got pregnant with my first son. Perhaps even before that—when I got married and became a marked woman for life—wearing my child-bearing years like the scarlet letter.

I returned to offices a few times since—for the odd contract or project. But every time has been fraught with guilt at home and guilt at work. I felt like I was never really doing anything particularly well, torn as I was between two places. Each time, I returned to my home office even more determined not to go back.

Balance vs Imbalance…

I always thought it was my industry that essentially edged me out. But the more moms I talk to, the more women I meet who have been ousted from their respective workplaces and industries. Even after years of our lives where most women bore the brunt at home and at the home office.

It’s not surprising, even, when you look back over time. As Ann Douglas writes in her book Happy Parents Happy Kids, “…There have been seismic shifts in the world of work and yet few corresponding workplaces or social policy shifts to help us manage that load.”

I’m going to try to restrain myself from quoting Ann’s entire chapter on “work-life imbalance,” but suffice to say that between the economic pressure on dual-income families—never mind single parents—and today’s culture of “total work,” it’s no wonder parents scoff at the mere suggestion of work life balance. Ann points to such everyday occurrences as incompatibilities between the school day and the workday, not to mention how government offices and medical services “seem to assume that there’s a parent at home during the day ready to function as a full-time appointment concierge.”

I’ve been talking a lot lately about having a village. As the saying goes, “It takes a village to raise a child.” And while the assumption is usually that the village means grandparents and aunts and uncles, I’m seeing more and more how the village can also be your community: your neighbours, fellow parents at school, and yes, your work—why not? I mean every brand today is trying to get under the covers with us—in our homes, in our fridges, in our shopping carts. Why shouldn’t they shoulder some of the load? You do want our business after all, don’t you?

But it’s not just dollars and cents. If companies want to become part of the community, they should have to pull their weight on the home front as well and walk the talk. And that means supporting parents in the ways that they can. Which means not calling us when we’re on our hard-earned vacation with the kids, letting us clock out at the end of the day, and offering the flexibility of remote or at least hybrid work so we can focus on our families once the work day is done.

The key, it would seem, is flexibility. As this Forbes article cites, a survey by FlexJobs found that working parents ranked workplace flexibility ahead of salary. A whopping 84% of working parents said work flexibility is the number one most important factor in a job, with work life balance ranking in as a close second at 80%. And according to a LinkedIn survey, as reported on Bizwomen, while people generally love the idea of perks like free food and game rooms, research shows that this is actually one of the least enticing factors for keeping professionals at their current companies. Rather, the most popular benefits were flexible hours, more vacation time, and work-from-home options.

Though many companies like to think and say they are family-friendly, holding somebody’s job while they’re on mat leave and letting people bring their kids in for Take Your Kid to Work Day once a year is not it.

Saying it and doing it are two completely different things.

What Parents Need for Work Life Balance

We need sick day allowances for families with kids—for the kids and not just for the parents. When I used to report to an office every day, I used to forgo my own sick days—coming in with migraines and backaches—just so I could use my sick day allowance when my kid really needed me. That’s not looking after moms or dads.

We need flexible work arrangements that let grownups be grownups, responsible and accountable for their own tasks regardless of the time frame that that happens in as long as timelines are met. Board room meetings that start at 9 am, 4 o’ clock brainstorms, and 5 pm conference calls that assume 24-7 childcare are not family friendly. Sure, parents can make it happen—parents are always making everything happen—but the stress before, during and after isn’t conducive to their best work—in the office, or at home.

These are just the basics. I could go on about the sociological, environmental, and communal benefits of job sharing, remote work, and other flextime arrangements. I could talk about companies vying for my head-of-the-house dollars but undervaluing my contributions in their very workplaces. I could talk about companies that spend thousands of dollars hiring agencies to survey their treasured demographic when all they have to do is ask the moms on their team—if they have them. And if they don’t, they really should ask themselves, well, why the hell not?

But let’s start with baby steps. And I’m not just talking about moms; we need to do the same for dads. For all caregivers—if you’re not one now, chances are, you’ll be one soon too.

I’m not a big fan of the nanny state; I don’t expect anybody to babysit me. But if a company thinks that it’s important to host after-hours happy hours, ping pong tournaments, and weekend retreats to engender loyalty and goodwill among their employees, maybe they should look at what they’re doing in terms of ensuring the basic necessities for work-life balance for the parents and caregivers on their team. Not only as a business but as a member of the community.

It’s in everyone’s best interest—business, government, neighbours and even co-workers—to support parents, as a community, and as investors in our shared future.

The post Parents: We Need to Talk About Work Life Balance appeared first on SavvyMom.

It cost over $700 and I can’t remember the last time I spent that much on myself, my husband, or our home, but I slapped that credit card down with zero qualms. I scoured stores for that just-right duvet cover and pillowcase. Agonized over artwork and bookcase placement. All because I wanted his room to be his ideal sanctuary, a place where his imagination could roam free.

Now, when my son rebels, his first inclination is to trash the place. Down come the picture frames and artwork, the memories, the peace.

One Friday night, my husband had sent our son to his room for being rude. And then a second time for being unapologetic about being rude. Each time he went into his room, much clanging and banging followed.

“Please, daddy, can I come out now?” he sweetly begged.

“Did you learn your lesson?”

“But I didn’t do anything!”

“Then no. You haven’t learned your lesson. Back to your room.”

I cowered in the kitchen because I would have caved a thousand times over, and I didn’t want to play the good cop to my husband’s bad cop. I also wondered what my kid thought was so bad about being sent to a room that had been so carefully curated for his enjoyment.

“Please, daddy, can I just come out and watch the hockey game with you?”

Oh, please, can he? Hasn’t the boy suffered enough? It’s Friday night!

My husband wasn’t bending. “No. You’re staying in your room all night and that’s it.”

I’ll give him all the credit in the world, because it would have been easy, and much more pleasant, to let our son come out of his room. Sometimes it’s really hard to just say no to our kids. Perhaps because as parents we’re built to want to give only, not deny. Mostly, we just want them to be happy, and to like us. Yet, sometimes—or most of the time, even—being a good parent involves doing the thing that puts us out of favour with them.

Case in point: While I managed to hold fast to keeping Fortnite out of our house, I don’t mind if my eldest plays it at friends’ houses—it’s my way of controlling how often and how long he plays. Plus it keeps it from his younger brothers.

Anytime we talk about Fortnite with other parents, though, they always insist, “Don’t get it!” And yet they have it. And they continue to let their kids play with it, as much as they dislike the behaviour it helps create. And inside, I’m thinking, Well, why the hell don’t you get rid of it?

I’m so proud and grateful that my husband didn’t give in that Friday night, even if it made him unlikeable in my son’s eyes. I know he was thinking that if we don’t stand our ground now, how will we get through the teen years? All we did was banish my son to his room, a place that I had so carefully ensured is a place he can feel happy and safe in. So why is this even considered a punishment?

And why was it so hard for me to see him denied when all he had to do was apologize? It’s just as the old-fashioned saying goes: This is going to hurt me more than it does you.

I’m not condoning spankings, I’m just saying parents—myself included—need to take back “No.”

I think for a while now parents have been encouraged to negotiate, and that doesn’t always work. Sometimes a simple, firm “no” is exactly what kids need. Maybe now more than ever.

The post Sometimes Saying No Instead of Yes Is Exactly What Kids Need appeared first on SavvyMom.

But somewhere along the way, I became a total control freak. I got so good, in fact, that accepting anybody’s help (let alone dad’s help) only got in the way. Including my partner in life, my husband.

Sure, I let him cut the lawn the way he likes and decorate the living room with his album covers. But everything else is on me. And usually, that’s the way I like it. Except when I don’t.

See, by being a control freak, I’ve let my guy back off. And the less he does, the more I resent him for it.

I Wanted Dad’s Help, But I Wanted It My Way

It all came to a head one Father’s Day weekend. I had spent the Saturday afternoon doing a million errands, as us moms do, and I returned home, exhausted, only to find my husband, sons, and daughter in the exact same positions that I left them—on the couch, in the basement and in her crib napping, respectively. The desire to scream was almost uncontrollable. You did nothing!

Before I even uttered a word, my husband could see I was going to blow.

“We just came in!” he swore, in a panic. “The kids have been outside all day!”

I stalked off—it was Father’s Day after all. I wanted to give the guy a break, but first I needed to cool down. And that’s when I realized: He wasn’t the problem. I was.

I know I’m not alone. Even this morning, I overheard a couple of moms at the park complaining about their husbands. When one woman asked the other why she didn’t get her husband to help out more, the other woman answered, “Because I don’t like the way he does it; I like it my way.”

And that’s the crux of the problem.

See, if we want our guys to step up—and I know many of us do—we need to get out of the way. And that means letting go of the outcome.

Whether it’s putting away the dishes, making the bed, or keeping the kids busy on a Saturday afternoon, we have to let dads help do it, and let them do it their way. It’s not going to be perfect. It’s not going to be the way you would’ve done it, but at least it saves you the trouble of doing it yourself.

The alternative is doing everything yourself, and that’s not really sustainable, is it?

If you were the boss of your own company, would you hire everyone the same? Or would you hire people with different skill sets and experiences to fill the gaps in yours? And wouldn’t that mean having to be more flexible in style?

It’s not that different at home. No one likes to be micro-managed. And if you want to engage your team, you need to give them ownership, over tasks as well as decisions.

At home, that means letting dads steer for a change. That way, us moms, too, can enjoy the view.

The post If You Want Dad’s Help, Get Out of the Way appeared first on SavvyMom.

At home, we are going through so many lasts, it’s making my head dizzy. My son, now in Grade 6, has already nixed reading to him in bed, a good night cuddle and even being seen with him at school.

Not only that, but the conversation has changed entirely. I’ll ask him about his day and instead of an answer, I’ll get quizzed on the latest YouTube stars. He’s spending more time at friends’ houses, and less time at home. He’s stepping out of reach, picking up things from other kids and adults, and coming home and telling me things he’s learned that are out of my control.

He thinks about the future, and I have to hold my tongue while he tells me about his dreams and goals. He hangs out alone in his room, browsing online, while his younger siblings play and watch TV together. And on Saturday mornings, he doesn’t come to our bed anymore.

Worse, speeding along in his footsteps, his brothers won’t be far behind, I know. It reminds me that before I know it, all the shouting at the dinner table will be replaced by awkward silences, Sunday phone calls and holiday get-togethers.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. It’s just that, when your kids are younger, the future is hard to imagine. You’re so caught up in surviving day today, it can be hard to see the finish line. The middle-grade years are, in my house anyway, the first hint of things to come.

Which is why, on the nights when my middle-grade son does want me to stick around if only to ask questions about the world lingering in his mind, I have to tamp down the sobs. Because he’s still mine, if only for a while longer.

The post The Middle Grade Years Are Breaking My Heart appeared first on SavvyMom.